Did We Forget Something?

Original meaning of 'sin' (to forget):   

    Think if you will of the scripture passages stating that 'Jesus/Jehoshua died for their sins." If he died because we had 'forgotten' who we are, this would change everything about religion.

One won't get far enough in religion to truly awaken, why? Religion has distortions which cause more confusion. Just like in the example of sin meaning 'to forget.' Religion sets one up to believe in an external God. This is very confusing in a way that to become 'like God' one must be judged by this external God and then placed in the area you've earned. Once placed, you live there for eternity. So those who don't make the grade don't actually get to become 'like God' at all. Hmmm, better luck next time I guess?

    Further confusion comes as fear of this 'judgement'  when one becomes fearful of offending God and at the same time completely full of adoring love for God's tender mercies and blessings. How can one truly attain growth being in complete fear and complete love at the same time? If this were a marriage between two people this would be a considered an abusive and co-dependent relationship. 

• "I'm afraid of him/her, but I truly love him/her and will do anything for him/her to make him/her happy."
• "I know that it's stressful at times doing all the things he/she asks me to do, but I know in the end it will all be worth it so I consider it a blessing to have him/her in my life."

The questions:

1. "Am I afraid of being judged for the things I have fallen short of in my lifetime?" 
2. "Do I believe Jesus atoned for my sins and where I fall short, in the end he will make up the difference?"

If Jesus is going to make up the difference for us all why have judgement in the first place, for anyone? Why not call it an analysis instead of a judgement?

In my opinion this does not make any sense and it gives away the responsibility. I feel I am responsible for my growth as I am Divine in my nature. I need to strive to understand what I can from each experience. In the end, I decide if I am ready for the next lessons, or if I need to repeat a few in a different way to understand even deeper meanings from within each one.